Hurricanes blow, both meteorogically and footballically

Email from H to E:
Attached is the pic of the cookies of which I took two bites today.  They are going in the trash now, so as not to tempt me any longer.  I made them for the game on saturday.  They are peanut butter cookies rolled in crushed pretzel rods.  It looked like pieces of wood after a storm, so I thought I would call them something appropriate, as you can see by the sign.   I ate none on the day of the game,,, which is willpower that I think deserves some pounds lost.  But alas, my weight stays steadfast.

E:
Holy Martha Stewart!  Those look delicious!  Sweet and salty are a truly deadly combination. 
I think you're willpower on gameday will pay off long term.  And homemade sweets are the best kind to eat.  So this is really a win-win.

Side note:   Buckeyes trounced the Hurricanes- win-TOTAL F-in' win.  Wait, I don't think I"m using that term right.

H:
"Win-win" is a great term.

Weakness Challenge: Week 2

From E:

We're going to the State Fair tonight and there is no way that I'm not eating a funnel cake.  I believe the Wyandot County fair is also very soon?  Perhaps we could take a "fair break" from the challenge.  Or just pay up because I'm not missing the one time of year that I can have a funnel cake. 

H:
HA!   And I have nada to report today!!!!   woopie!!!   I'm very excited. 

I think a fair break is a GREAT idea!!!!! 

Also, Mom just told me a very inspirational story about a guy who had stage 4 liver and colon cancer, who changed his way of life, ate NO sugar, all whole foods, and is now alive 5 years later.  It just reminded me how bad my diet is.  I mean, I really eat well compared to how I used to eat at least.  I may eat too much, but it's mostly good stuff.  But I still eat too much sugar and processed food.  So I'm going to try to stick to this!!! 

And since you're going by bite, I can too, I guess.  So put me down for, like, $20 for the tortilla and the peach crisp the other day. 

Is the state fair close by?  Will they have the normal fair animals in Utah, or is it like going to the zoo in Africa, where they have dogs and cats and shit?

E:
I had part of a funnel cake from the fair last night along with a bloomin onion (which was pretty gross); fries, and pork nachos.  I'm regretting that today as you might suspect.

H:
oh yeah, I suspect I know that feeling.  also, you said you were giving up candy.  Funnel Cake isn't a candy. So the way I figure it, you're good to go.
E:
I think I said sweets.  Fuuuudge.

H:
To the blog!!!

H:
Yeah,  you said sweets.

I've tried everything else...

Email from E:

What is your weakness?  Do you eat sweets?  Too much wine?  Skip the gym?  Watch lame TV shows?  Use the f-bomb in front of your kids?  Well, do I have a challenge for you!  (And you can blog about it on your new Simple Life blog). 
Step 1:  Identify your weakness.  Mine is sweets.
Step 2:  Commit to the Weakness Challenge until December 31, 2010 which means that you owe me $1 each time you fall victim to your weakness.  Totals will be tallied weekly and all proceeds will go to the charity of choice. 
Step 3:  Email me when you f@$k up, so I can keep track of what you owe. 
I'll do the same.  Deal? 

H:

So as I was reading your sales pitch, as you were asking what my weakness was, as I went through each one, my internal voice answered, yeah, uh huh, yep, that too...     But if I must pick one that I"d like to work on, I would say my weakness is white flour and non-whole grain breads, plus I would like to include sugar as well.  So I guess I don't have to pick one.

You're on!!! 

E:

On like donkey kong beotch!  And are you kidding me?  You are going to give up white flour, non-whole grain breads, AND sweets?  You crazy. 
If you start to look pasty and too skinny then we'll have to reevaluate the challenge.  So don't turn kooky eating disorder on me ok? 

H:

uh, don't think that will be a prob.there's a bag of mini heath bars in the back a-callin' my name-o.  Yep, that lasted about 2.5.

H:

also, have you met me? My life-long goal has been for people to think I have an eating disorder; and I still can't tip the scales back below one-fitty LBs

E:

24 hours into the challenge and we're both in the hole.  We'll be broke by the end of the year. 
I DID eat some raisins/cranberries but I'm not going count those against me because they have fiber which makes me woo and real sweets can't possibly do that.

H:

I, actually, did not eat ONE Heath bar, or any other piece of candy, for that matter.  I did, however, eat one entire shrimp quesadilla (wrapped in one, very nice, flour tortilla).  So if we're going to count each bite, which I have an issue with, btw, I can't possible give a guess as to how many bites it took to get to the center of my shrimp quesadilla.  So why don't we just tally it by serving.  So I owe 1 crisp dollar bill, no?

Sidenote:  Woo creation and coercion to its inevitable "fruition", in your case, no pun intended, IS a handy bellweather for figuring whether or not something is candy or not. 

p.s. may i post this on my blog?  I am currently the only reader.  Megan says she's a follower, but noone logs in to follow blogs like mine in real life, so I think we can be safe in believing noone will ever see it.

H:

First, I forgot to tell you I would only refer to you as E, or as nothing at all, whichever you prefer.

Second, I just made a peach crisp yesterday, and as I went to dump it down the drain tonight, I tripped and accidentally ate at least 2 servings.  So add $2 to my tally for today.  You're right.  we're gonna be broke.

H:

Ok, start agaaaaaiiiiiiinn...  NOW!

E:

Yes, you may call me E.  Or nothing at all..... hahahahahaha. 

Two SERVINGS?

"You have a blog? What's it called?"

An email sent earlier today regarding hannah's simple life blog:

"It's called hannah's simple life. Someone suggested calling it "I'm Awesome" because I am, but then I thought that would be off putting.  Someone did, actually, suggest it.  What?

How it started: I was looking at Diane's "Tracing Ray" blog, and I was trying to figure out how to leave a comment.  I signed up and somehow got to the point of having a blog by accident. For a while I have thought about having a blog, but felt impeded by my lack of writing talent.  But some of the emails between me and you and all of us girls DO entertain me so much.  And I've thought in the past that having a blog where I could post some of these emails might be entertaining, at least to us. So that's what I've started, since I had a blog by accident anyway. There are only two posts. And one of them is the email I sent you today aboot movies. Not that I thought that was particularly wellwritten, or funny for that matter... but it still keeps in the spirit of blogging, I think... but anyway, there are only two, and you were the recipient of one of them, so, probably not too entertaining for you."

Movies?

Response to an email received from a best friend, expressing concern that her Netflix queue was low, followed by a request for suggestions with which to fill said queue:

sidenote:  another best friend has already responded concisely with a one sentence response recommending the AMC series Mad Men...

"Mad Men. hmm. I tried to watch it twice and hated it. But lots of people I love and respect are hooked on it... so I must've been wrong about it. Ok, yes, I'll give it another shot.


I haven't watched it yet, but I have it at home, A Single Man. My mom said it was really good. Have you seen A Dark Knight yet? I know that's random, but it really is good. The most recent season of Entourage is out on Netflix now! I have that at home too.

Other movies I haven't seen but want to: 2 Days in Paris, Vicky Christina Barcelona, Alice in Wonderland, Brief Interviews with Hideous Men (directed by Jim from the Office aka John Krasinski)

Movies I saw that aren't great, but that I liked a lot anyway: The Proposal. Game 6. Game 6 is different, with Michael Keaton and Robert Downey, Jr. It all takes place in one day. Michael Keaton is a famous playwrite who has his new big play opening on Broadway that night, and it's about his day- he has an affair, there's an explosion of some kind and he has to hole up in a pub and there occurs a long conversation with a famous theater actor he's worked with before, he has to go to the theater and deal with his lead actor who can't remember his lines, he deals with is daughter who hates him, he visits his father in the old neighborhood... but through the whole thing, he's getting eaten up inside with stress over the report that a famous reviewer of plays (one, Mr. Robert Downey, Jr.) is coming to his play tonight. Like I said, it's weird, and preposterous. But I still really liked it! great acting.

Next? :)"

quick question...

IM sent to close friend this morning:

hi!


quick question.

nobody responded to my someecard that said, "I'm outdoorsy in that I enjoy getting drunk on patios." Now, i thought that was hilarious.

so my question is, why didn't anyone respond? not funny enough?

or does, as I suspect, everyone hate me?